Jersey City Divorce 3 Critical Tips to Avoid New Jersey Divorce Court

By Santo Artusa on August 31, 2019

You may have heard it, you may be worried about it as to what can happen in New Jersey Family/Divorce Court. Sometimes what people have heard or what they are about to face is concerning and because of that, people stay in their marriage or simply do not file for divorce. If you want to file for divorce, you must know what not to do and what to do, if possible. I say if possible because if you are facing a domestic violence charge, you may be out of your house already. 

Before I get to my three tips that might seem obvious but often not followed because of anger, sorrow and other feelings that do not help individuals going through a divorce. Most people get so angry in divorce cases that they cannot see straight, they cannot think straight, how does this help you? Actions taken in anger will only lead to terrible results, which will lead you to further anger and regret. Breathe! Take a step back from your anger and/or sorrow and get focused. Do not try to handle the battle on your own, work with an experienced divorce attorney. Even if your divorce attorney was getting a divorce, he or she would hire an attorney too. When you are so invested in the relationship or anything in life, and it does not go well, you will only see your side of the story and this can lead to poor choices. Poor choices will cost you anguish and in divorce court, alot of money. Don't try to handle the case yourself. Penny wise, pound foolish is very true in divorce court. 

When you file for divorce, parties may still live together or you party may have left the marital home/apartment, one party may seek relief from the court while the divorce is pending by way of motion. A motion is a request from the court for certain relief. That relief can be for: alimony, child support, freezing certain assets, seeking to sell a property/preventing the sale of a property, parenting time, legal fees for the other side and other related relief. If this relief is granted, you can be in serious financial trouble. For example you may be ordered to pay legal fees for your spouse which can be thousands and thousands. You can be ordered to pay alimony which can be almost all the household expenses. A court order can destroy your life, can affect your job, your reputation, everything you work for can be on the line, SERIOUSLY. I've seen men (when I represent women) who earn $250,000 per year be ordered to pay $9,000 per month and $10,000 in legal fees, while they have to pay for their own expenses (new apartment, etc)  You need to prevent this! We can help you. 

So as promised, I will offer you 3 tips and actually include two bonus tips for you:

  1. Do not leave the marital home (Do not move out) If you have moved out, we need to talk fast.
  2. Do not get into a situation where a restraining order can be issued against you. No threats in person, no threats via email, text, calls, etc. 
  3. Be civil with your spouse
  4. Do not use the children as pawns
  5. Of course, hire an experienced divorce attorney

Again, while the above may seem obvious, many spouses do not follow this advice and this causes chaos in their lives. Honestly, how can you concentrate at work, while you are getting destroyed financially because of a court order? It is very hard, trust me, it is very hard. Most of my clients are very smart and very successful and they struggle with this when they come to me after a court order has been issued and before they retained me. Why do that? Don't! Guys and Gals that were happy outside the marital home end up at a therapist and elsewhere to obtain prescription drugs for anxiety and depression from divorce proceedings. There are ways to prevent this! 

If you want to file for divorce or have received divorce papers in New Jersey from firms, contact my team at the Artusa Law Firm in our Jersey City Office today or our Clifton Office on 973-337-9643. We represent clients in Jersey City (Hudson County), Newark Area/Short Hills, Nutley, Belleville (Essex County), Clifton (Passaic County), Hackensack (Bergen County) and beyond. Until then, stay calm and stay positive!   Please see our video about alimony here:

-Santo V. Artusa, Jr., Esq. 
26 Journal Square, Suite 205 (new office)
Jersey City, NJ 07306


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